I don’t go out and about very much, but when I do I plan my snacks wisely. I figure out if I need to pack food for lunch or dinner. I figure out what locations I’m going to be at and where I can bring my own food, or have them make me food. I always sit or go somewhere where I am close to a restroom, so if my food from 2 or 4 days ago decides it’s finally going to digest I can make it to the restroom in time.
For me though, grocery shopping for my simple soft foods that I can eat, that is when I find out I’m always hungry. I know 90% of the food in the grocery store is going to make me sick. I know that when I crave something, I really want it but I know I shouldn’t eat it, so I don’t. I don’t eat it and I don’t buy it...
However, I slowly walk around the store to get my food of jello, pudding and soups. My grocery bill of pudding, jello, etc... is always more than it should be. It’s not because I’m buying a hundred dollars of food I can eat and digest, it’s because I’m buying food that I am hoping might be digestible by my stomach. I read all these posts from one of my gastroparesis support groups, seeing what food works for most of us. Interesting thing I’ve discovered in this short time of being diagnosed with gastroparesis is that we are ALL different. Also, not even that we are ALL different on what we can digest, but even each of us individually change on what we can digest. One day we can have ground turkey, the next day we can’t. One day we can have white rice, the next we can’t. If we eat something our body doesn’t like, we pay for it for multiple days (some months).
Here is what I do know. I know I am thankful that I don’t have to work so I can figure not just this disease, but all of my diseases out. I’m glad I have the opportunity to listen to my body and rest if I don’t feel good. I’m glad I have supportive friends and family that tell me to keep pushing for answers and not to give up. I’m glad they secretly tell me here’s a bathroom far away from everyone so you can deal with your stomach. I'm glad they reach out in private before an event to make sure there is something I can eat. I’m glad my loved ones tell me to keep trying new foods and care about going to places I can eat instead of telling me I shouldn’t have eaten it.
So, all in all.... this diagnosis of gastroparesis sucks and stinks (literally), but it has made my diabetes more manageable, has made my outlook on life a little more thankful, has made me realize the real pleasures in what I have. Sure, I can’t eat or make for myself bacon wrapped pork loin or cake anymore, but that doesn’t mean I can’t experiment with ingredients and create new recipes that might just work for this foodie. I have always loved food, this disease won’t get this foodie down. Yesterday I ate a turkey dog, and my stomach handled one dog and a piece of bread without crust. That was my meal, but that is a huge step for me. So, today I ordered casings so I can start making my own "hot dogs." You see, everyone is dealing with something, it just is how you look at it and what you do to change the outcome. I have good and bad days, but it's time I start having more good than bad days.
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